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General Imprint:. Jay Carter. Hello, Login. Visit Our Stores. Everyone knows a person who has been hurt, betrayed, or degraded by nasty individuals or has experienced it themselves.
Nasty People: How to Stop Being Hurt by Them without Stooping to Their Level
In three books, Jay Carter, Psy. Now for the first time, this series is released together to cover all areas of dealing with difficult people. With straight-talking advice, real-life anecdotes, and psychology that makes sense, Carter explains how to handle and stop painful behavior that harms both the perpetrator and the victim.
Includes bibliographical references p. Surefire methods to neutralize the nasty people in your life Have you been hurt, betrayed, or degraded by a nasty person? What does this prayer accomplish? First it frees you from thinking curses back on this person. It also fits closely with God's view of forgiveness-you release to God the full responsibility to punish their sin. This prayer of blessing enables you to be at peace in your heart even though the relationship may not have changed. Blessing those who curse you also speaks to how you talk about this person who has cursed you.
Instead of speaking to others about the hurt and how wrong the other person is, you can choose to only speak in a positive way about that person. Do not repeat the curses of this person so the whole world can know how wrong they are; instead choose to speak kind words. If you can't say anything else, tell others you are praying that God will bless this person who has hurt you. Pray for Those Who Mistreat You God's fourth assignment for you is to "pray for those who mistreat you. Rarely do we have the power to change them, but we do have the power to change our response to this person.
God simply says, pray for them. So what should I pray about? Pray that God will help you to love this person. Pray that God will help you to see what are the good things God wants you to do for this person. Pray that God will bless this person. What do these prayers do?
They focus your attention on God. Instead of being consumed with the hurt, you focus on God the one who can heal the hurt, and give you the power to respond in a radically new way. I remember seeing a young child run to his mother with a sad face, and as soon as he was in the arms of his mother he burst out crying, and eventually told her why he was so sad.
I remember being so amused by this child because he had waited until he got to his mother before he started crying. But what a beautiful picture of how God wants us to respond!
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Instead of sitting down in the midst of the one who has hurt us, and crying to ourselves about the hurt, we need to keep our mouth shut, and run to Jesus, and pour out our heart to Him. King David demonstrates this many times in the Psalms he wrote, speaking of the betrayal by friends and enemies- calling on God to punish them. What is interesting to note is that David did not cry out to his generals to go kill those who were treating him this way.
When David was fleeing for his life because his son Absalom was leading a rebellion, a man named Shimei came out and cursed David and threw stones at him. When one of David's generals asked permission to take off his head, David responded-leave Shimei alone, perhaps God has told him to curse me. See 2 Samuel What an incredible response in such a difficult time! David protects himself from sinning by trusting God, and assuming that God's plan is beyond his own understanding.
How can we pray for those who mistreat us? King David's response gives a powerful example. God may want to use the hurtful behavior of others to help you grow. The example of Christ sends the same message.
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Those who crucified Jesus did it with the intention of getting rid of Him. But God used their evil actions as His path to provide for the salvation of the whole world. When people say and do hurtful things, God has a plan for our response.
These four steps in Luke are only the beginning of what God says in the Bible, but they will provide most of us with a fulltime challenge of putting them into practice. These four responses God calls us to use do not in any way send the message that God endorses the hurtful things others do to you. God sends the message to you that He has a plan for your response, and His plan will take you beyond the hurt to a place of healing and growth. Then, just like Joseph you will be able to look back on that hurtful experience and say, "You intended to harm me, but God used it for good to accomplish His plan in my life.
As a young man in Egypt, he had plenty of reasons to harbor anger toward his brothers for their evil actions.
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But it's clear that Joseph put his trust in God, and chose to have a positive attitude toward his circumstances. Soon he was the leader in Potiphar's house. Then betrayal came crashing on him again, when Potiphar's wife falsely accused him of raping her. This time he ends up in prison-probably spending many of the best years of his young adult life behind bars. Even in prison Joseph continues to put God first in his life, and God blesses him. Joseph had no way of knowing what the future held for him. Yet he harbors no bitterness toward Potiphar.
Finally God opens the prison doors and in one day Joseph goes from prisoner to leader of Egypt, second only to Pharaoh. God uses him to prepare the nation for the coming famine. When the famine finally affects Joseph's brothers and father, they come to Egypt looking for food. Joseph could have planned revenge and killed his brothers, but instead he loves them, and brings them all to Egypt to live with his blessing.
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When his father dies many years later, the brothers come pleading for mercy because of their past actions. Joseph still responds with love and forgiveness, showing in his answer how he sees this past painful experience: "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. Used by permission. These devotions are provided at no charge.
Nasty People How to Stop Being Hurt by Them Without Stooping to Their Level
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